What is Commitment Velocity?

It’s the…

Speed at which you fall for him

Have you ever had a friend fall so fast for a guy that you thought she had lost her marbles and was likely heading for a whirlwind of self-punishment? You may be surprised at just how common this problem is…

Level of interest you reveal to him

How much and how soon does he want to know how into him you are? How to strike the balance between encouraging his advances, nurturing his confidence, but not scaring him off prematurely…

Urgency of needing his verbal commitment

How soon do you normally feel like having ‘the talk’..? You know, when you attempt to lock-him-down into exclusive commitment to you. How subtly can you ask a guy if he’s ready to ‘settle down’? And how desperate do you seem to the male mind?

Speed at which he falls for you

Usually this happens waaaaaayyyyy more slowly than how fast you fall for him. That’s not because he’s such a totally hot catch and you’re run-of-the-mill, no no. It’s because men are emotionally slow! He needs _____ (what?) — and no, it’s not ‘time’.

Get His Devotion

What Makes Men Commit?

Not the common commitment of boyfriend and girlfriend just for convenience and casual dating which often feels little more than a friends with benefits type of arrangement..

…I mean a soulful heart-felt devotional commitment with love that reaches beyond the positive hormone chemicals of dopamine to something deeper.

A recognition of shared values, shared ambitions and deep respect that makes him feel as if live without you is no life at all.

I would be doing you an injustice if I attempted to give you the answer to that question in one single article.

Understanding the full answer takes some time and requires making some key integrations about the nature of men, how they think, and how that fits in with your own female perspectives.

NO easy task…

But one that is being pieced together as I write for the benefit of all.

How do I know?

Because I’m the one piecing it together — primarily for my OWN benefit as I finally want to find a suitor and start a family myself!

Through interviews with leading dating and relationship experts, discussion with clinical psychologists and counsellors, and real-world experience of coaching certain women in my life who’ve gone through radical and sometimes rapid transformations… becoming better able to relate to men, attract them, and secure them on lock down 😉

To hint at what’s involved with making a man commit to you with devotion, let’s list out a few key points:

Enthusiasm for all that he is — if you want a guy to be completely committed to you, then he needs to feel that you are totally enthusiastic about his mission, ambition, and strength as a man and lover.

Space — if you don’t give him space to breathe, in the way that he needs, not in the way that you project.. Then you’ll soon lose him. Don’t get grumpy every time he doesn’t txt you during the day, or when he goes on a guy’s only holiday, or watches too many sports games too many nights in a row. Men needs space to re-charge, even away from you. When he experiences that gift of space, he’ll snap right back to you like a rubber band because he will think that you ‘get him’ and fit him like a glove.

Sexual satisfaction — and no I’m not even talking about you satisfying him. For a man to be devoted to you, he must believe that he is completely sexually satisfying to you. And since men aren’t too bright nor too confident when it comes to the bedroom in a lot of cases, you’re going to have to spell it out to him. When he gets things right in the bedroom, be sure to let him know through moans or verbally by telling him GOOD that feels, to keep doing THAT, to OH MY GOD YES YES YES.. But it has to come form a genuine place. That’s how to keep a man devoted to you sexually. Let him have his wicked way with you and genuinely show your mind-blown satisfaction.

Be a woman — Now this one might be a little controversial, but deep wisdom often is. Let him open doors for you (but don’t be bitchy if he doesn’t). Let him fix things around the house, even if you can change a light bulb faster than he can. Don’t get too involved with choosing the route on a map, even if he should have asked someone for directions 10 minutes ago. Let him feel like a man. Yes, a stereotypical man, strong, capable, king of his castle. This helps him devote himself to you emotionally.

Be your own woman — what I mean by this is… live your own life, through your own values, maintain a busy schedule, be involved with your friends lives, be interested in things outside of your relationship. The more he sees that you are a happy, healthy and passionate individual regardless of the relationship, the more he will value the relationship.

Like I said, there’s lots more besides these, and lots of details for each of these we’ve touched on.

If you don’t already receive emails from me and would like to, add your email in the form on this page for more On Intimacy.

In devotion,


PS. If you haven’t read the first part in this 3-part feature article series, head on over to part 1: Find Your Mr. Right.


Why Men Pull Away

Why Do Men Pull Away When Things Are Just Getting Good?

Isn’t it obvious?

Because they’re shallow, selfish, immature, afraid of commitment and polygamous perverts…

…Woh, woh, woh.. Slow down there sister.

The things I hear women say about men still surprises me sometimes.

And from my extensive experience around the world looking into relationship dynamics in various cultures I can put hand over heart, look you straight in the eye, and tell you that men the world over absolutely DO want long-term relationships.

They’re NOT so shallow, immature or afraid of commitment at all!

Selfish polygamous perverts… maybe.

But they really, really do want that sweet, romantic, loving experience of life-long devotional commitment that you want.

They just approach it differently…

You’ve heard the concept of kissing a frog and one turning into a prince, right?

Well would you feel terribly offended if I report that many women kiss princes and promptly turn them into frogs…

You see, men and women are DIFFERENT.

We approach love differently.

We approach sex differently.

And we most certainly approach relationship commitment differently.

If you can accept that then you have a chance of cracking the courtship code to finally, once and for all, attract the ideal suitor for you.

Courtship, I define, as ‘the dance of dating for the purpose of long-term romantic love’.

It’s the ‘dance’ bit that women get wrong, from men’s perspective. Which sends said men running for the hills. Tragic but true.

But not necessary. If only you had been handed the ‘bro-code’ which I finally decided to reveal through The Intimacy Code, despite some of my ‘bros’ saying I’ve broken the sacred vows of manlihood by revealing all of our secrets.

What they don’t see is that by levelling the playing field so both sides knows the real rules of the dating game, both sides benefit.

There is no ‘winner takes all’ in the ‘battle of the sexes’.

There’s either relationship success, or relationship failure.

Key reasons why men pull away include:

Women being too emotionally needy.

Women getting emotionally involved too fast without the guy feeling that she’s gotten to know the real him yet..

Women putting pressure on the guy extremely prematurely in early stages of courtship about ‘settling down’, ‘starting a family’ etc.

Women interpret men’s behaviour as lacking emotional commitment when often times it’s just that men have a different approach to commitment.

All of these things scare men away…

Do you notice how all of those are about what women do?

Because from the man’s perspective, the reason he can’t commit, isn’t because he doesn’t want to, but because he’s not ready to or able to given the things that you do to push him away…

So try to think of it from this perspective:

Men don’t pull away, women push men away… turning princess into frogs. From that position of self-responsibility, you become super-empowered to finally treat men in a way that let’s them breathe a giant sigh of relief, and let’s them quickly take the lead in building emotionally devoted commitment to you and with you.

Join me the experience On Intimacy for a life-long learning curve of erotic, romantic, relationship bliss.

If you don’t already receive emails from me and would like to, add your email in the form on this page.

In devotion,


PS. Let’s face it, you’re not everyone’s cup of tea. Sometimes men realize you’re not compatible and he moves on. No problem. There’s plenty of fish in the sea.

The trick though, is going fishing in a way so that you do get everything you want from you relationships and ultimately attract your ideal suitor. Your Mr. Right. Your prince charming.

He does exist, he is out there, although he may not be waiting for you. You’re going to have to show up on his radar.

Find out how in our 3rd part of this series on the Next Page as an introduction to The Intimacy Code. Click for Part 3: Get His Devotion.


Finding Your Mr. Right

Hi, I’m Gavriel.

And what I know about relationships could fill 10 volumes.

It’s generally a topic I avoid with close friends and family… as my approach to relationships isn’t exactly ‘kosher’.

And please excuse the following fairly bad metaphor but it helps make my point…

Most people can’t see the wood for the trees when it comes to romantic love and relationships.

They’re in the thick of the forest and settle for a near by tree that looks sturdy enough to lean on for support, shelter and sustenance.

For me, ever since witnessing my parents chronically argue since I was a toddler all the way through to them splitting up when I was 11, I’ve had deeper questions about the nature of romantic relationship.

What’s more:

I’m a globe trotting traveller… 32 countries across a combined total of 52 months spent outside of my home country, the UK.

I’ve had literally dozens of relationships, from short-term to medium and one of 4 years…

I’ve spoken to men, women and couples around the world with my greatest question in life at the front of my mind (although I kept it relatively secret until recently).

“What Makes For A Successful Romantic Relationship?”

From my travels and extensive conversations and intense curiosity I know how men think around the world: about dating, sex, relationships, women, love, marriage, monogamy, polygamy, you name it.

And in 2014 I arrived at some conclusive insights. Insights that allowed me to help several women to better understand not only the men around them, but themselves as well.

  • Where to find ideal suitors.
  • Why men pull away.
  • By what process do men fall in love.
  • How to seduce with confidence so that men become devoted to you as a woman, a lover and a life-time partner.
  • How to resolve conflicts through sharing each others true self, and learning to communicate in each others male vs female languages…

After close to half my life searching, I cracked the code to courtship.

Courtship let’s say is the ‘dance of dating for the purpose of long-term romantic love’.

A dance that most people seem to fail on miserably… Stepping on each others toes… The man not being strong enough to lead…

The women not being able to trust the man to lead so she leads her self, the relationship, and unknowingly sabotages her chances of being asked for a 2nd dance because the man feels emasculated…

Men today who for the most part have lost their sense of mission in life.

With women trying to pick up the slack and then making several devastating mistakes with dating that leaves them confused, disappointed, heartbroken — having wasted the better part of their lives searching for authentic love and connection.

Through a strange turn of events I just happen to be the guy to piece together the Intimacy Code and invest my life into bringing it to the masses.

For that, I founded On Intimacy and I hope that it serves you to find true love, or strengthen the love that is already in your life, and help you sustain it for all of eternity.

Let me share with you the best ways to find and attract your ideal suitor while I pursue my own journey of finally finding and attracting my own, by using the same ‘courtship code’ that is coming together through my research on this website.

If you don’t already receive emails from me and would like to, add your email in the form on this page for more On Intimacy.

In devotion,


PS. Continue on the Next Page with part 2: Why Men Pull Away.


Welcome to Authentic Intimacy

In the 19th Century, ‘finishing schools’ taught women how to be prim-and-proper housewives…


The Intimacy Code is blowing the lid off politically correct approaches to dating, empowering the modern woman to take the lead in the courting process.

Through the collaboration of an experienced dating team, we’ll become the go-to source of training for the entire lifecycle of relationships, from that first swipe on a dating app, to the first time he says those 3 magic words, and beyond.

Take one of our online courses, attend a live workshop, or receive private coaching to help you create romantic bliss with your ideal partner without heartbreak, confusion or wasting time.

Spirit Sex Love seminar with David Deida

David Deida lets it rip in Byron Bay, bringing great humor, wisdom, and light to the perennial issues surrounding love, intimacy, sexuality, and spirituality.

This 12 part series presents the entirety of the professionally produced video Spirit Sex Love, which offers a lively demonstration of David’s teaching methods and an introduction to his teachings on sexuality, spiritual growth, and true intimacy.

Part 1 below. If you like that, continue onto YouTube for the full series: David Deida Spirit Sex Love seminar.

How Does the Brain React to a Romantic Breakup?

by Chelsea Brennan, Minneapolis

You’re in the midst of a breakup and feel like a different person.

You find yourself spending a lot of time longing for your ex, constantly checking her Facebook updates, and wondering what went wrong.

This shift in patterns of thought and behavior may be caused by neural changes that occur after a breakup.

Continue reading at ScientificAmerican.com: How Does the Brain React to a Romantic Breakup?